Monday, August 31, 2009

To Bee or Not to Bee

I am a big Weddingbee Fan.

I started reading it back in September. Um yeah, I didn't get engaged until April! I had an idea of what I wanted, and I started researching on the web to see if it was attainable for me. I didn't want to get my hopes set up for a Forest Park affair if I couldn't afford it (I couldn't!), so I started seeing what was within reach for Ryan and I.

Weddingbee was one of the first websites I found, and I've been hooked ever since. I've thought a lot lately about if I want to try to blog for them. I know it's really hard to get picked. I can't apply until 8 months out, which would be October, and I'm pretty torn on if I want to try for it or not. I love blogging, I've had a blast doing this, and it's so nice to go back through and read through past posts and have an illustrated journal of what I've been up to. I take way more pictures now, and I love having this record of my life to look back on.

What's holding me back from Weddingbee is mainly their stance on the LGBQT community. There aren't any same-sex bees, and the company is owned by E-Harmony. I'm a huge supporter of the LGBQT community, and Ryan and I are getting married in the Unitarian Univeralist church, which is a leader in the fight for equality for the LGBQT community, because we feel strongly that people are born that way and deserve to be treated as such, and not as freaks or as people choosing to live a "bad" lifestyle. I don't feel good about helping to make E-Harmony money (they are huge proponents of Focus on the Family, and I am not). I don't feel that Weddingbee is as welcoming toward same-sex couples as they are to heterosexual couples. There is a conspicuous lack of same-sex bees, and there are very few same-sex members on the boards.

Anyway, I don't know if my involvement (if I was even chosen, which is quite the long shot) would actually make any money for E-Harmony, but I am trepidatious about helping their business to grow in any way. I don't know how I feel about participating in a community that (in my opinion) is not welcoming to LBGQT couples. I do know that I love following the Bees and have gotten so many ideas from them, and I would love to give St. Louis a voice on Weddingbee. There aren't any bees from this part of the country, and the boards are dead! I wonder if my involvement would encourage same sex couples to be more active and vocal on Weddingbee. In that case, I would be all about it.

I don't know. I have plenty of time to think about it. I also need to sit down and talk to Ryan. He's a very private person, and I don't think he would be entirely comfortable about me splashing our lives all over a huge blog, so we would need to see if he's comfortable with it and to set some guidelines of what he is OK with sharing and what he isn't.

What do you all think? Any Weddingbee applicants out there?


  1. Although there haven't been any same sex bees chosen yet (or maybe not even applied), there have been several bees with a strong voice for their opinions on this issue. The first one that comes to mind if Cherry Pie. I'm sure, since you're such a big fan, that you know all of this, but I wouldn't let that stance stop you. I think that you could uphold your ideals and still blog for them...just my two cents.

  2. I'm a fan of Weddingbee, too. I'm not sure if I'll apply or not. I think that your strong feelings would be a refreshing voice, if not on the blog, then at least on the boards. I'm an advocate of marriage equality, too, but I don't think that blogging or simply being a part of Weddingbee hinders that. But I understand this is a tough decision, and as long as you feel good about whichever path you choose, you're in pretty good shape. Good luck!

  3. I don't think your views on LGBT issues should hold you back from applying to be a Bee. Marriage equality is something I feel very strongly about as well and I think WB is very open to LGBT issues and people.

    There was a post a while back talking about why there weren't more African-American Bees. Pengy or Mrs. Bee pointed out that they can only pick Bees from people who apply. If they don't have any black brides applying, they can't choose any black brides to be bloggers. I think the same goes for gay couples.

    I really think you should go for it. You could also PM Pengy or Mrs. Bee and voice your concerns. Good luck with your decision :)

  4. I'm a weddingbee addict too. I do think that some bees like Cherry Pie do lend their voice out to others in this subject.
    I personally would love to be picked some day, but I feel that it might now happen :(

    Good luck to you!

  5. Wow. I had no idea. Now, I am a little less keen on WeddingBee. Thanks for sharing.

  6. I have to disagree with the other ladies who think you shouldn't let your stance on LGBT issues hold you back from blogging for WeddingBee. I also had no idea that they were owned by EHarmony, though I was aware of EHarmony's views. Thanks for posting this.

    I think there are plenty of other sites, like Wedzilla or Blogger Brides, that you could blog for and not compromise your morals. Also WeddingBee makes you post pictures of yourself, which some people or fiances may not be comfortable with, while these other sites do not.


Hearing from you all makes my day!