A dear, dear friend of mine, Melissa, is getting married a week from tomorrow. I'm a bridesmaid in her wedding.
Last night, her matron of honor called her and dropped out of the wedding.
She didn't drop out of the wedding because of a death in the family, or a sick husband or child, but because of selfish reasons. She was in charge of the bachelorette party, and she refused to let anyone help her plan it. The planning was very poor, prices for the party doubled overnight on Wednesday for all of the participants, and she called the bride, wanting the bride to front the extra money. She "tearfully" called another bridesmaid and turned over the planning of the party to her the day before yesterday.
In conclusion, this girl is embaressed. Her solution is to drop out of the wedding. Scratch that. She had her husband call Melissa's fiance and drop out FOR HER.
This post isn't to crucify the ex-matron of honor, but I wanted you all to have enough background to know that her reasons for dropping out are selfish. I feel that she needs to suck it up and stand up with Melissa regardless of how embaressed she is. Because that's what friends do.
I am heartbroken for Melissa. Her wedding planning road has been rocky at best, and I hurt for her, because she has had to work so hard to isolate the joy in this process. She has had to cling so hard to her love for her almost-husband in the face of some really ugly family nonsense and now, some really ugly friend nonsense. I wish I could do something for her, to ease this a bit. But all I can do right now is listen and do whatever I can to make sure she has a blast tomorrow at her bachelorette. Which doesn't feel like it's nearly enough.
It's just another reminder that wedding planning truly does bring out the best, and the worst in people. And sometimes it's a reminder of the warm and lovely people you have around you, and sometimes it's a reminder that a close friendship wasn't at all what you thought it would be.
I hate hate HATE this for her. She's so close to wedded bliss, then this happens.
Did bad behavior surface during your wedding/wedding planning? Do you have anything warm and fuzzy to pass on to Melissa? I know how much kind comments can help when bad things happen!
Thursday, October 21, 2010
So Ryan and I close on our first house November 1st! We are first time homebuyer's, and this whole process has been quite the education. Mortgage stuff sucks hardcore. It isn't nearly as fun as looking at living room inspiration pictures. It's actually just like wedding planning!
Closing on the contract=getting engaged
Excitement all around, woohoo! We're on top of the world!
Waiting waiting=initial planning stages
We can put this here and paint this this color. THIS IS SO EXCITING. Much akin to wedding colors and the pretty pictures on heavily styled blogs.
Mortgage nonsense=wedding logistics
They need to know where I worked 5 years ago? They want pay stubs from my internship? They want WHAT faxed to them right this second?! Very similar to "the hall only holds 300 but we can't possibly invite less than 400...WHAT DO WE DO?! and my parents want to invite their 3rd cousins WHY WHY?!" Hair ripping out ensues.
And I'm assuming that actually closing and getting the keys and walking inside your first home is a lot like the wedding day...overwhelming and wonderful. A happy ending!
Ryan and I are so, so lucky to be able to have the kind of house we're about to have. I am super pumped to really make it our own and make it look like new again (it isn't in very good shape and needs work).
Quick warning on escrow: Escrow can suck it. And the banks are so into covering their *sses now that you have to pay 14 months of taxes and insurance up front AND keep paying both of those every month like you haven't paid way ahead anyway. Apparently with interest rates being so low, this is just the new climate of home loans.
I want to show you all pictures so badly, but the pictures online are not my property, and I hate posting things without giving credit to the source. I don't want to link back to the house for safety reasons...but I don't think the real estate site cares, right? So I'll throw a couple up here without giving credit. Shhh, don't tell anyone!
I am itching to paint those cabinets a nice clean white and paint a wall navy. I saw it in a picture online and it looks phenomenal.
The living room:
Just a sneak peek, with so much more to come! This place is going to be full of house nonsense.
Is the nesting bug getting to you?
Friday, October 15, 2010
So last night, Ryan and I went to my little sister's conference cross country meet. Ryan had to stay and do recruiting stuff, so we didn't leave until 6:30. We were both starving, so we went and ate at Panera. Ryan had brought some bank papers in to show me over dinner, but we both got so excited over the prospect of broccoli cheddar soup in a bread bowl that we lost track of them. So we're driving to Schnuck's to get some produce to tide us over until our next big grocery run, and Ryan realizes that he left said bank papers at Panera. I pull up at Panera, park haphazardly so Ryan could run in, and wait until he comes back. As I'm waiting, I spot my long lost friend Suz sitting inside! Of course I dash in and bear hug her.
I worked at an Italian restaurant in town for 5 years, all 5 of those years with Suz as the manager. We were buddies. She's one of my absolute favorite people. Her dad passed away a few years ago, and she quit her job and moved in with her mom, changed phone numbers several times and stopped going out. I've been looking everywhere for her ever since, and last night I finally found her!
Me and Suz on a Bella Italia lake trip:
Me and Suz at Halloween:
I wish I could've tracked her down so I could get her an invitation to the wedding, but she has been through so much and I am so glad that I found her again!
Hurray for long lost friends!
Have you lost track of anyone important to you?
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
So Nikki over at The Fashionable Wife tagged me in this question game that's been making the rounds. Hopefully this will alleviate the spectacular boredom of waiting until Nov 1st WHEN WE CLOSE ON OUR FIRST HOUSE!
1. What is your favorite book?
I have about 50. I can't help it.
-Favorite Sci-Fi book: Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card. Best surprise ending EVER. And there's a movie coming out Card is writing the screen play!
-Favorite Romance: Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell. And Pride and Prejudice and Northanger Abbey, both by Jane Austen. Oh and Like Water for Chocolate.
-Favorite Scary book: The Stand by Stephen King, also The Shining and his collection of short stories, Skeleton Crew.
Misc: Anything by Dr. Crossan and Dr. Borg. Anything Pearl S. Buck writes, especially Imperial Woman.
2. How did you meet your significant other:
He was assistant coaching my little sister's cross country team, and I spotted his hot self at the state meet. I facebooked him and 6 months later we were dating!
3. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Prague by myself. London with my sisters, Fiji with my husband.
4. What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time?
I love thrift store browsing. I love to sew and quilt, and I never get tired of books.
5. If you didn't have to worry about money, what would be your dream job?
I would love to organize events for the Alzheimer's Association. Sewing or quilting would be a fun job too.
6. What is one thing that never fails to make you feel better after a long or hard day?
Ryan giving me a shoulder rub or making me dinner. And a successful shopping expedition is always good therapy!
7. What is your favorite thing to cook or bake? Or, what is your best recipe?
I have a tiramisu layer cake recipe that absolutely kills.
8. What is your favorite thing in your closet?
I have a black dress from Banana Republic with a ruffled neckline that makes me feel like a million bucks.
So who's it next? I'm tagging...
So ladies, if you have a few minutes....
What was your favorite moment from your wedding? The one where you think of it and feel all warm and fuzzy inside?
Do you sing in the shower or in your car when no one's around? What's your favorite song to belt out?
Flats or heels?
How long do you want to wait to have kids, if you're planning on having them at all? No judgment meant in the least, just curious what other people's time lines are!
How many nights a week do you and/or your partner cook?
If you could change 1 thing personality trait about yourself, what would it be? (I would 100% change my grudge-holding tendency)
Thursday, October 7, 2010
So....Ryan and I put an offer in on a house! And after lots of back and forthing, we have an inspection set up for tomorrow. We'll see what it turns up...I'm cautiously excited. The house was built in 1924, so there could be dozens of things majorly wrong with it. The house was really nicely renovated 6-7 years ago (wiring updated, plaster pulled out, new insulation, drywall put in, new windows, etc), so we should be in good shape. But we'll see, I'm not going to get all "we can put this there, and we should paint this room this color!" until we see how this inspection turns out. I have lots of ideas of course...but I'm not going to superimpose those ideas onto said house until this inspection is done.
Also, last week, I was driving home from an interview (more on that next week!) and I got in a wreck. Lame. But it turns out that a guy I went to grade school with works at my insurance agent's office! Weird, right?
Ryan and I have a double date tonight with my sister Alli and her super adorable BF Chris. He only eats cheese on pizza and he makes phenomenal popcorn.
Ryan and I are camping this weekend too! The weather looks like it's going to be gorgeous.
Oh and we turned in our first draft of edits on our wedding album. The list was...lengthy. And we need to pick out which pictures we actually want to print. Because we haven't done that yet. Oops!
I don't understand how people who have kids get anything done. I've been trying to get over to my Grandma's all week to finish up the binding on my quilt (I'm DYING to show it to you but I want to wait until it's finished) but it just hasn't happened. ARGH. Next week Grandma, I promise!
So what's rocking your world?