Tuesday, February 2, 2010

This or That?

I have always been indecisive.

This was inconvenient and mildly annoying before wedding planning, but unfortunately, wedding planning has turned this personality trait into a holy nightmare.

I realized this Sunday afternoon. I was standing in David's Bridal with my friend Melissa. We were there to try on each others bridesmaid's dresses, as we're each in each other's wedding. My wedding dress is bought and paid for and in need of alterations (which I am hopefully doing this week). We had to wait a while for a dressing room, and of course we looked at all the dresses they had displayed around the store. I tried on dozens of dresses in my search for a wedding dress, and I know good and well that full skirts do not look good on me...and there I was, kicking myself for not getting a certain full skirted dress they had in the store.

The same thing happened Saturday. Ryan and I went to David's Bridal to look at bridesmaid's dresses. The maids of honor will be in aqua, and I needed to pick out a red dress for the other 3 bridesmaids. We went through the catalogs, figured out which dresses came in the color we wanted and narrowed it down from there. After we had reached a decision, I started stressing. There were so many cute dresses that came in the color we wanted but were long, maybe we should pick one of those and have the dresses shortened.

It occurred to me that I must have zero faith in myself and my decisions if I second guess things the way I do. I've second guessed everything about our wedding planning except for the church (and the decision to marry Ryan, but that one was a no brainer). It's driving me nuts, because I am not happy with hardly any decisions I've made. I make decisions, and then 3 months later I torture myself thinking I could have gotten a better deal, I should've tried this, etc. etc.

I have to stop this indecisive BS. I have to be at peace with the decisions we make. I have to focus on how many options we looked at and the fact that we chose the things we chose for good, solid reasons.

Easier said than done, but I have to try, because I can't take this going around and around anymore. It's exhausting!

Are you indecisive? Has it made wedding planning more difficult?


  1. O.M.G. Did you write this post about me? I feel the exact same way! I second guess everything. My Dad (he knows so much about weddings, not) keeps telling me that I need to just make a decision and I can't look back. Easier said than done I tell him, but he is right! Although we want the day to be perfect, it's impossible, and no one will ever know but you. No matter what decisions you make they will be beautiful and they will be "you".

  2. I think you just need to remember why you made the decision in the first place - nothing wrong with trusting your gut, and leaving it at that.

  3. I am so like you lady! Its been driving me nuts more often than not! Mr. Milk reminds me that I spent a ton of time researching something before making a decision, so its well thought out, and once the decision has been made, to try to put it out of my mind, don't look back, and focus on the next thing. I think I've become somewhat better at it, but it still gets frustrating.

  4. I agree with chocolate lover, once you make a decision, move on. Don't look back, and don't look into other options! I'm the same way, and I spend so much time figuring out exactly what it is that I want...It's horrible. That's why I had this problem with the dress...if you look at how much time I spend looking at everything else, and how much time I spent looking at dresses, you would be shocked. But when it all comes down to it, in ten years, you're not going to be looking back at your wedding and asking yourself if you should've done this instead of that...

  5. The more options we have the more predisposed we are to indecision it is a fact. I say, close your eyes and point. ;)
    It is hard to make a decision go with it because if you spend as much time on the Internets like I do there are options thrown your way whether you like it or not. Remember though, that there are no wrong choices. Okay, I lied there are obviously wrong choices. I mean OMG. But you have good taste and at the end of the day is that what matters: that you have the absolu-ment perfect dress for your bridesmaids? No, you have the absolut-ment perfect bridesmaids. That's what matters. The big stuff. The small stuff is just cherry on the top. Who cares if it is canned?

  6. I am exactly the same. Nearly drove myself insane. Try to go with your gut. The decisions I made that way were the ones I was happy with.

  7. Luckily I've been pretty decisive. My problem is that I find too many ideas that i like!

  8. I used to be a decisive person but since the wedding planning has started I'm questioning absolutely everything. I've just got so many thought processes going on at the one time. Plus I'm trying to keep so many people happy that it is really difficult. Sorry no help for you but I'm glad I'm not the only one. x


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