Thursday, May 6, 2010

79 Days

Not too much has been going on around these parts...I dropped the invitations off at the printer's on Monday and got all crazy psycho proofreader on their butts and found some mistake, so crazy psycho definitely worked out in that circumstance at least. They are supposed to be done by tomorrow, which is fantastic as Ryan and I have a shower this weekend and we're going to hand them out at the shower. I know the traditional etiquette frowns on that, but really? If someone thought to hang on to an invitation for me, hand it to me in person, smile and say, "We really hope you all can make it," I am absolutely not going to say "Hmmm, it's awfully rude to not put it through the mail." Plus everyone at the shower is invited to the wedding so I just don't see the issue there. The etiquette police know where to find me.

Also, the envelopes for our invitations came in last week and they all have a return address on them, hopefully more addressing can happen next week so we can get the invites out the door.

OK, be honest and tell me if I'm being stupid. My cousin is getting married a month before Ryan and I are, and I just got her invite in the mail last week. Her invite is super similar to mine. And now I'm all paranoid that people are going to think I copied off of her or something. Which is dumb, because both invitations are long and narrow with script and no graphics. I think I'm being stupid. I obviously have a problem fixating on things.

I am torn on the addressing of the envelopes. I know traditionally it should say "Mr. and Mrs. " Fitzwilliam Darcy but I don't like that because what about her name? So I want to put "Mr. and Mrs. Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy" but here we go etiquette wise again. And since we don't have an inner envelope, that complicates matters as well. We have a space for names on our reply postcard, so I thought about writing all of the names in there and then they can fill in the # of people coming (it says "out of ___ people ___ will be attending" and we plan on filling in the first blank so it's harder for people to add guests we did not intend on), but then we won't know how many kids and ugh I don't know. I guess we could also put everyone's names on the envelope, so it would say "Mr. and Mrs. Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy and Child's Name Darcy." What do you all think? I'm obviously confused.

I am making some bridesmaid's presents for my girl Melissa and I need to purchase a zipper for my sewing machine in order to make these presents. I need a zipper foot anyway so it works out just fine. I need to hit up a sewing store in St. Louis this weekend because the next weekend my sister graduates from college WITH A 4.0 (bad*ss) so I'll be in Cape.

Ryan's sisters and mom are throwing us a shower this weekend, and our registries are seriously depleted. Hopefully Sunday we can go out and add to them. We've been really good about only registering for things we really need and not just extra stuff we won't use, but I think we need to expand our scope...because if our registries get depleted after a shower, our 260+ person wedding will totally devastate them. I made a list of stuff so hopefully we can get them nice and stocked again, like picture frames, a GPS system, extra towels, games, a cooler, tools, luggage, a firepit, a camer, etc. We have obscenely generous families and friends. What are some of the off-the-beaten-path things you registered for?

Oh I've been working on the table overlays for the reception, and I have 30 done. I have extra fabric so I think I'm going to make as many as I can. I think these will be nice to have extras of for the cake table or whatever else. These are super tedious and I am very excited to be almost done with them.

I need to figure out how to decorate the cake table, gift table and guest book table. I am not sure at all what to do, so if you all have any ideas, please chime in! We have tons of milk glass, so we could use those and order extra carnations, and the extra overlays could be used here. My sister suggested pictures of family weddings, which is a good idea. But they still sound kind of bare, so I need to come with something simple, easy and cheap.

Kind of a brain dump, sorry! We are definitely out of the fun and fluffy part of wedding planning and we're down to the nitty gritty not-so-fun stuff. I dread putting together itineraries for the photographer and the DJ, we have a stack of worksheets we need to work through. And we are definitely getting a new pastor so we need to meet with them.

Fortunately, dance lessons just might be on the horizon....


  1. It's getting closerrr my friend! I think it's great you're hand delivering some of the invitations. Saves on postage, you're absolutely positive they received it, and it's so personal! In this case the etiquette gods are all wrong.

    As for addressing, we probably did the wrong thing, but I don't care. We just wrote "John and Jane Smith" on the outer envelope and we didn't have an inner. No Mr. or Mrs., just the names. No one has said anything to me about it yet, and I honestly don't think anyone was offended (and if they were, too bad). And it's not like we're having a casual wedding, it's definitely formal. I really wouldn't stress too much about it. You've got bigger fish to fry, trust me.

    Have a happy shower!!

  2. I totally wouldn't worry about the invitations being similar. Who obviously didn't copy hers because there was no way you could have seen them before you ordered yours. No one looks twice at them anyways.

    And I think it's sweet to personally hand someone an invite.

  3. Regarding the similar invitations, don't worry about it. No one will think three times about them. (Twice, maybe, but definitely not thrice.)

    And I know what you mean regarding the 'Mr. & Mrs. HisFirst HisLast' . . . it really rubs me the wrong way, and I refused to do that for our Save the Dates, much less our invitations! We don't have an inner envelope either, but I will be doing Mr. & Ms. HisFirst and HerFirst TheirLast. (Unless they have different last names, in which case it will be Mr. HisFirst HisLast and Ms. HerFirst HerLast. And I'm pretty sure I did Ms. on the Save the Dates, but I can't remember.) As far as children goes, we're just doing 'The So-and-So Family' if everyone is invited in the house; it was much easier than writing everyone's names on the envelope, especially if there is more than one child involved!

    For the number of people RSVPing, we thought similar to you guys in terms of putting the actual people's names on the RSVP card, with a little checkbox next to their names. No name, no RSVP. We're also doing some of the cards with a 'RSVP online' option, and it's set up so that only the people who are on the guest list can RSVP. No adding of random plus-ones!

    Etiquette police be damned!

  4. exhale - you have a ton going on my dear, i say at this point do what you want (re addressing and your invite designs) and just say f-it! you have had months and months of planning now it's just get it done time, no second guessing or major changes allowed!

    ps. i would be totally happy to receive an invitation in person, i think i'd just like to see it already had my name on it so i didnt feel like an add on.


  5. We wrote first names

    as in Mercy, Jason, Anthony, Matt and Marissa for my sister's husband and kids.

    No one complained.

  6. I understand about being out of the 'fun' part of wedding planning and in to the nitty gritty. We are like 9 days out and my list of things to do are major boring and major time consuming. Schedules for the day of the wedding? Yeah, those suck, but it is helpful to start it early and there are lots of templates online to base yours off of to get your started. That's what I did. Now I'm just tweaking it, days before the wedding.

    Hang in there, you'll make it! I think hand delivering your invitations is fabulous! I did that for a few of our invitations (saved us on postage!) and it was so fun to see their faces light up when they saw our invitations.

    I say, it's y'all's Wedding, do what you want, and don't care about what others think!

  7. I'm glad you went crazy psycho - spelling errors on invites are SO not cool!

    Also since when is handing out invites rude? I'd be pleased to get it by hand.

    On our invites we addressed them - Mr.Fitzwilliam and Mrs.Elizabeth Darcy. I hate having my name left off things.

    I don't think anyone will think you copied - but I know I would think that exact same thought if it was me!

    That's so great about the shower - and that your registry is depleted! Means it's working.

    Family wedding pictures sound lovely.

    Good luck with the dancing x

  8. I love brain dumps that aren't my own!

    1. I love the sis' idea of the family wedding photos. Are you thinking of doing just your parents and Ryan's or multiple family members? If it works well, it would be cool to have 2-3 generations on side, and then a photo of the two of you in the middle. You could stagger the milk glass vases of flowers throughout to add depth.

    Another Idea I had for your cake/misc tables was using the organza flowers (similar to those in crosages) and place them sporatically on the tables. Those seemed simple to make, and that would really tie in your flower theme. I don't know if you have the time (since you have that annoying friend's items to make) but you could do both red and aqua organza flowers for a pop of color. I originally thought colored small pebbles or gems would work, but you don't really have any other instances of that in the decor. I dunno, just a thought.

    And girlfriend---if there's any reason to go psycho, typos on invites is the best of them. Unacceptable! :)

    Unfortunately, I just went with the traditional "Mr. & Mrs. Joe Smith" on my save-the-dates. For kids I added "...Smith & Daughters," or "...Smith & Family" etc. A little overtraditional in that sense. I think your choice of wording is fine however. I hate when my name gets left off of things as well. Oh, and P.S. I can't wait for your beautiful face to hand-deliver that gorgeous (not copycatted) invite.

    Oh and take a deep breath. Sometimes a girl just needs a brain dump. :)


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