So you know how I mentioned that our officiant peaced out? And then the church wouldn't call me back with a new one?
Well they did call me back with the name of a minister, and when I called him, he sounded super weird. I was not optimistic.
Last Sunday Ryan and I headed to the church to meet with him. I'm not skilled at keeping emotions off my face, and Ryan said when I shook his hand at first I looked like I was not having it. I need to work on that, that emotions on my face thing.
Anyway, we sat down and talked to him for over an hour.
He is awesome.
He is so weird, but he's like quirky, endearing, awkward weird. We like that weird. He went to a Unitarian Universalist seminary in Chicago and he worked as a UU pastor for 5 years. He stopped doing that to do what he does now; he's a hospice chaplain. Which totally got me, because it takes an unbelievable type of person to be able to do that every day. I was sold as soon as he said that, but the more he talked the more excited I got. When he outlined his religious views for us I wanted to jump up and down....I LOVE the UU church so much, there truly is room for absolutely everyone there. And he really wanted to get to know us, he asked us all about how we met and where we want to be in 5 years, how many kids we want, who pays the bills, etc etc. The pastor who was going to marry us before he peaced out treated our wedding like a job he had to do, but this pastor was so excited, he said that weddings provide a great balance to his day job.
This whole pastor switch up definitely turned out to be a blessing in disguise, and I am super enthused about our ceremony. Ryan and I are working on it this weekend, I'll keep you posted!
Are you excited about the church you're getting married in, or about your officiant? Have you had any seeming-disasters turn into fortunate circumstances?
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
I just finished reading....
The Nine Parts of Desire: The Hidden World of Islamic Women, by Geraldine Brooks.
Geraldine Brooks was a war correspondent in the Middle East for years, and she spent an incredible amount of time with Islamic women in many different economic and religious situations. She details how Islam is tied into numerous governments, and she also talks about where many of the (oppressive to us) rules impressed upon women come from. It was super interesting to me to find that the basis for so many of the rules women must adhere to (not driving, the hijab, obtaining permission from their husbands before they can leave their homes) does not come from the Quran. The religious leaders in these countries have made big assumptions based on what they think the Prophet would want, which is sketchy to me. I do that all the time with Jesus, but he was crystal clear when he told people to love others as they love themselves. Anyway, it was surprising to me how little foundation there is for these rules, and how the men are taking advantage of people's faith to subjugate them.
I'm off the soap box! I also read another Geraldine Brooks book a week or so ago, this one about an ancient haggadah call The People of the Book. A haggadah (to my understanding) is the book Jewish families use during Shabbat dinner to guide them through the order and the prayers. A book preservationist is put in charge of preserving a haggadah saved from a museum in Sarajevo during the war. She finds small artifacts throughout the book-a thin white hair, a wine stain, an insect's wing, and through all of these you learn the story behind the sacred book. I really enjoyed the format of this, it was very engaging.
And last night I stayed up until 11:30 to finish the sequel to the Hunger Games, Catching Fire. When I read the first book I stayed up until midnight, so don't start this book unless you can commit to a marathon reading session! The sequel was really good, but it did get started off a bit slower than the first book. I really enjoyed it, and for a young adult novel it was well done. The last book comes out in August, I believe, and with the cliff hanger ending I will be more than ready!
I just started Karen Armstrong's new book, "The Case for God," and it looks like quite the text, so I think it's going to take me a while.
What are you reading right now? What's on your summer reading list?
Geraldine Brooks was a war correspondent in the Middle East for years, and she spent an incredible amount of time with Islamic women in many different economic and religious situations. She details how Islam is tied into numerous governments, and she also talks about where many of the (oppressive to us) rules impressed upon women come from. It was super interesting to me to find that the basis for so many of the rules women must adhere to (not driving, the hijab, obtaining permission from their husbands before they can leave their homes) does not come from the Quran. The religious leaders in these countries have made big assumptions based on what they think the Prophet would want, which is sketchy to me. I do that all the time with Jesus, but he was crystal clear when he told people to love others as they love themselves. Anyway, it was surprising to me how little foundation there is for these rules, and how the men are taking advantage of people's faith to subjugate them.
I'm off the soap box! I also read another Geraldine Brooks book a week or so ago, this one about an ancient haggadah call The People of the Book. A haggadah (to my understanding) is the book Jewish families use during Shabbat dinner to guide them through the order and the prayers. A book preservationist is put in charge of preserving a haggadah saved from a museum in Sarajevo during the war. She finds small artifacts throughout the book-a thin white hair, a wine stain, an insect's wing, and through all of these you learn the story behind the sacred book. I really enjoyed the format of this, it was very engaging.
And last night I stayed up until 11:30 to finish the sequel to the Hunger Games, Catching Fire. When I read the first book I stayed up until midnight, so don't start this book unless you can commit to a marathon reading session! The sequel was really good, but it did get started off a bit slower than the first book. I really enjoyed it, and for a young adult novel it was well done. The last book comes out in August, I believe, and with the cliff hanger ending I will be more than ready!
I just started Karen Armstrong's new book, "The Case for God," and it looks like quite the text, so I think it's going to take me a while.
What are you reading right now? What's on your summer reading list?
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Impatience
So I just mailed our invites (all but 5 or so, still waiting on a few addresses) on Monday. Yesterday 3 got sent back due to lack of postage (umm..oops). Our RSVP deadline isn't until June 24th, but I am not far away from harassing people to send them back. Yes, I'm that impatient. I want to knowwww!
And I'll post about our invites soon, I promise! Let's just say they total $1.84 per invite including postage. Love it.
How long did it take for your RSVPs to start rolling in?
Em and Cupcake, you 2 are on my mind this week, I'm wishing you both joyful, loving, blissed out days!
And I'll post about our invites soon, I promise! Let's just say they total $1.84 per invite including postage. Love it.
How long did it take for your RSVPs to start rolling in?
Em and Cupcake, you 2 are on my mind this week, I'm wishing you both joyful, loving, blissed out days!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
You Can't Have it All
One dress cannot be all dresses.
Yesterday I stood in my mom's sewing room in my wedding dress while my sister Allison spent 30 minutes telling me how perfect it was. And I didn't believe her until I was driving to the fabric store later that night.
Why was I unsure about my dress, standing there in that sewing room? Because it wasn't a flowy, floating chiffon dress, and it wasn't a slinky Hollywood 30's glamour gown. It also wasn't a pert Audrey dress with a boatneck neckline, nor was it a strapless gown.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was expecting this dress to be all dresses.
It's "the most important dress," in so many ways, why wouldn't we want it to encompass everything we love or that flatters us in a dress?
But one dress cannot be all dresses. I love strapless dresses, but I also love the deep V I get in the back of my dress. I love floaty, romantic chiffon dresses, but a structured, heavy satin dress tailored to my body is beautiful too. My MeeMaw wore a satin dress and I'm glad I share that with her. I love modern lace, but no embellishments honor the minimalist/simple side of things that I love.
What I'm saying is (obtusely), decisions don't come easily to me, especially when I've had such a great deal of time to obsess and see other pretty dresses. But I made decisions when I picked out my dress, good decisions, decisions that don't mean I'll never be able to wear another strapless or lace gown again. Decisions that I am 100% OK with after realizing what my whacked out brain was doing. Because while this dress isn't absolutely everything that I love, it is a gorgeous dress that doesn't make me feel like something I'm not...it makes me feel like me, and it gives me a shape that I've never had before. It's a dress that has many elements that I love. A dress with everything I love in it would look ridiculous.
Now I understand why some of those girls on Say Yes to the Dress buy the dress with everything on it, because they can't stand to eliminate something that they love.
Thanks Alli, you are such a trooper through all of my crazy!
Have you run up against this one-dress-as-everything dilemma?
Yesterday I stood in my mom's sewing room in my wedding dress while my sister Allison spent 30 minutes telling me how perfect it was. And I didn't believe her until I was driving to the fabric store later that night.
Why was I unsure about my dress, standing there in that sewing room? Because it wasn't a flowy, floating chiffon dress, and it wasn't a slinky Hollywood 30's glamour gown. It also wasn't a pert Audrey dress with a boatneck neckline, nor was it a strapless gown.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was expecting this dress to be all dresses.
It's "the most important dress," in so many ways, why wouldn't we want it to encompass everything we love or that flatters us in a dress?
But one dress cannot be all dresses. I love strapless dresses, but I also love the deep V I get in the back of my dress. I love floaty, romantic chiffon dresses, but a structured, heavy satin dress tailored to my body is beautiful too. My MeeMaw wore a satin dress and I'm glad I share that with her. I love modern lace, but no embellishments honor the minimalist/simple side of things that I love.
What I'm saying is (obtusely), decisions don't come easily to me, especially when I've had such a great deal of time to obsess and see other pretty dresses. But I made decisions when I picked out my dress, good decisions, decisions that don't mean I'll never be able to wear another strapless or lace gown again. Decisions that I am 100% OK with after realizing what my whacked out brain was doing. Because while this dress isn't absolutely everything that I love, it is a gorgeous dress that doesn't make me feel like something I'm not...it makes me feel like me, and it gives me a shape that I've never had before. It's a dress that has many elements that I love. A dress with everything I love in it would look ridiculous.
Now I understand why some of those girls on Say Yes to the Dress buy the dress with everything on it, because they can't stand to eliminate something that they love.
Thanks Alli, you are such a trooper through all of my crazy!
Have you run up against this one-dress-as-everything dilemma?
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Pep Talks
Thank goodness for friends on Gchat who can talk you down off the edge....
me: So nothing big, just something
Melissa, you rock.
me: So nothing big, just something
3:46 PM I'm so stupid to keep adding sh*t to my plate
But I have a huge fear that everyone will think I put no effort into it, that I didn't do "enough"
| 8 minutes |
3:54 PM Melissa: Honey, that will be the absolutely LAST thing anyone says about this wedding of the century.
me: I hope so
Melissa: They'll more likely say "how the h*ll did this bride do it and LIVE till her wedding. She did SO MUCH on top of having a full time job! Whew!"
me: But the reception decorating is minimal, just the table overlays, centerpiece and candles
That's all I got
3:55 PM There aren't any cutesy details anywhere
3:56 PM But thank you for saying so
I mean, I was all bummed about how simple our invites were
And one of Ryan's friend at the shower loved them
I'm probably just way too close to this I guess!
| 5 minutes |
4:02 PM Melissa: Yeah, I think that's it.
We get so over-involved in our teeny tiny details, that it's obsessive.
no one but you will notice anything.
You know?
Melissa, you rock.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Must Make This
Must make this ASAP...as in, the very second I'm done sewing for the wedding and figure out what colors to use....
I think this would be a great first-time-quilt-project since it isn't so big.
I love everything about it, though the instructions on cutting up the white are slightly confusing.
Have any projects caught your eye lately?
I think this would be a great first-time-quilt-project since it isn't so big.
I love everything about it, though the instructions on cutting up the white are slightly confusing.
Have any projects caught your eye lately?
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Rehearsal
We are still sans pastor (and the church has "forgotten" to contact their other pastors, which is awesome since we're paying them a sh*tload of money to have our ceremony there WITH A PASTOR since we need to get married and all), but the rehearsal dinner has been successfully booked!
We were really scattered when it came to the rehearsal dinner. We originally set a small budget with the hope of having a casual pizza and beer kind of a deal, but the budget we set was just too small. The church wanted to charge us $70 to have it in their fellowship hall (which I think is stupid since we're already paying them a ton of $$ for the use of the building) and we had trouble finding a pizza place in the area. Once we branched out past pizza places though...we found a place that could do pizza and beer. Weird. I basically searched through "Kirkwood restaurants" in UrbanSpoon (I definitely just googled "Kirkwood restaurants", but hey, it worked) and looked at all of the restaurants listed to determine which would work.
Mike Duffys in Kirkwood actually answered the phone when I called (I'm on a bit of a streak where vendors won't call me), has a private room we can use, and can do a buffet with pizza, toasted ravioli, salad, pasta, and a drink for $10.95/person, which is right at $14/person with tax + tip. We're not going to purchase alcohol for our guests, since we've never once been to a rehearsal dinner where alcohol was included and we're getting them liquored up the next day.
So yeah, it's pretty much perfect. It's only a block or 2 from the church and there is plenty of parking. We've actually never eaten there (we tried to on Sunday, but they were closed), but everyone says its really good and the price was right. We didn't want to risk someone else booking the room, and we do plan on eating down there soon. We need to walk around in that area and check out possible picture locations anyway.
Once we established this was where we wanted to go, it took a whopping 5 minutes on the phone. Done. If only it could all be so easy...and if only I didn't feel the need to research every freaking restaurant in a 20 mile radius to make sure we got the BEST POSSIBLE DEAL. I'm exhausting to myself, I can only imagine what my family and friends think of me at this point!
I'm glad this is taken care of, and we ended up getting exactly what we wanted (for a slightly higher price, the budget we initially set was way too low).
Where are you having your rehearsal dinner? Do you feel compelled to research everything and wear yourself out?
We were really scattered when it came to the rehearsal dinner. We originally set a small budget with the hope of having a casual pizza and beer kind of a deal, but the budget we set was just too small. The church wanted to charge us $70 to have it in their fellowship hall (which I think is stupid since we're already paying them a ton of $$ for the use of the building) and we had trouble finding a pizza place in the area. Once we branched out past pizza places though...we found a place that could do pizza and beer. Weird. I basically searched through "Kirkwood restaurants" in UrbanSpoon (I definitely just googled "Kirkwood restaurants", but hey, it worked) and looked at all of the restaurants listed to determine which would work.
Mike Duffys in Kirkwood actually answered the phone when I called (I'm on a bit of a streak where vendors won't call me), has a private room we can use, and can do a buffet with pizza, toasted ravioli, salad, pasta, and a drink for $10.95/person, which is right at $14/person with tax + tip. We're not going to purchase alcohol for our guests, since we've never once been to a rehearsal dinner where alcohol was included and we're getting them liquored up the next day.
So yeah, it's pretty much perfect. It's only a block or 2 from the church and there is plenty of parking. We've actually never eaten there (we tried to on Sunday, but they were closed), but everyone says its really good and the price was right. We didn't want to risk someone else booking the room, and we do plan on eating down there soon. We need to walk around in that area and check out possible picture locations anyway.
Once we established this was where we wanted to go, it took a whopping 5 minutes on the phone. Done. If only it could all be so easy...and if only I didn't feel the need to research every freaking restaurant in a 20 mile radius to make sure we got the BEST POSSIBLE DEAL. I'm exhausting to myself, I can only imagine what my family and friends think of me at this point!
I'm glad this is taken care of, and we ended up getting exactly what we wanted (for a slightly higher price, the budget we initially set was way too low).
Where are you having your rehearsal dinner? Do you feel compelled to research everything and wear yourself out?
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